Money and marriage! Two blessed things that can easily become very complicated, especially when mixed together. I'd venture to believe we've all had an argument with our spouse about finances. I know I have!!
Do your money conversations quickly turn into arguments that accomplish nothing?
Here are my 3 tips for having money talks that are beneficial.
Communicate - Yes, I said it! You actually need to talk about finances together. And since the topic is not always a favorite, make it fun. Grab some ice cream, get cozy and plan a day and time you'll take about your finances. Make your first meeting no longer than 20 minutes and start by discussing these three things
Your goals - do you want to stop stressing about money, take a dream vacation one day, invest in real estate, pay for your daughter's wedding? Discuss your financial goals together
Discuss the budget - or create one together if you've never done that before. My budgeting course would be a great place to start for this. https://heroesfinancialcoaching.podia.com/building-your-budget-101
Something you can praise your spouse for financially. (Working hard, spending less on fast food, lowering their Amazon shopping)
2. Compromise - You will always have certain things that are really important to each of you when it comes to spending your money. Find ways to compromise so each of you can have a little give and take with your finances. I like to get fancy lattes, he likes to buy fishing gear and ammo. We find ways to afford these things within our budget and also tell ourselves no to things that don't fit within our goals.
3. Cultivate grace - Grace means to show unearned favor to someone. Don't get unnecessarily upset if one person overspends. Remember, you don't love them because of their great money skills. You didn't make a promise of "until you mess up our budget so we part". No, you love your spouse because they are yours, not because of their performance financially. So treat them accordingly. When one person fails to live according to your goals, take a chance to talk about it kindly, remind them of your love for them and ask how you can work together to do better next time.
Final words -
I know finances can be a difficult topic in marriages. In fact it's one of the leading causes of divorce. If you need extra help and guidance when it comes to handling your money as a team, I'd love to work with you in my 1 on 1 financial coaching. I've helped many couples work as a team and become successful in reaching their money goals! I'd be honored to walk alongside you as well.
Courtney